The little space of myself

After wy talk to me on msn ytd, vin called me. I called him back, and we chat over the phone for almost 2 hrs.

Cried to him about my worries, and unhappiness. We chat and laughed also. My heart lightened so much,and i slpt well. I missed him, really.

He told me he wanted to accompany me go this friday, too bad, i have to meet my ex colleagues tml. This week i m very busy. Delay again.

Sometimes, i really hope to leave all of them. Haiz.

Wenya, you can asked me " So i cannot accept you huh" ytd.. I dont know how to answer you. When vin n i were together, happily, during ndp 2006 and 2007, our times during Primers... You saw, you witness. I believe, you know and saw how much i loved him.

All these while, i treat you as my younger sister, as a friend whom i put my heart to treat you. But, when all these things happens, i asked myself before, can i treat you as the same.... At first, i cannot, because i hated you alot. Now, i can only say, a friend, yes you are.

I dont know, how far i can go in my life, without him...

You say, u will give him back to me, if.... But i can only tell u, i dun wan to snatch him from you. I dont want to be a third party. Though i really really hope and want him to be with me, so we can be a happy life, and to start a family together... But, i understand how painful to give up a person to another person. I cannot be a selfish person, to snatch people's love.

I dont want alvin to be unhappy. I want him to be happier. This is all. Although my life is in a big mess now, i really hope to say the word, 'I love you' to him. Not for what, but from the bottom of my heart, my true feelings.

Alvin n i believe in karma. I dont want my future to be worst den now, because, the pain is worst den death.

I hope u can understand.